Never believe anything my husband tells you. For example, when new people come to the studio and ask if there’s a bathroom, he says, “Yes but it takes quarters. If you need to make change, let us know now.” And when we were interviewing a woman to see if she would be the right person to officiate our wedding, he said, “Now, here’s where things get a little…awkward. See, my dad’s side of the family is nudist, so half the wedding will need to be performed nude, including all the guests and the wedding party. You’re okay with that, right?” Again, I can’t stress this enough: never believe anything my husband tells you. And if you’re a telemarketer calling our house, your day is about to get way more interesting. Take, for example, the telemarketer who called and asked for Budd Taylor.
S (in a hick voice): “Budd? I don’t know no Budd. I’m Ding.”
Telemarketer: “Ding?” (this was a rookie mistake, you’ve opened the door by asking a question, and now S will be off and rolling)
S: “Yes, Ding.”
Telemarketer: “You’re saying that’s your name?”
S: “Yes, first name Ding, last name Dong.”
Telemarketer: “Your name is Ding Dong?”
S: “Yes,” at which point he breaks into song, “Ding dong the witch is dead, which old witch, the wicked witch!” And then he hangs up.
Did I mention that my husband is in need of therapy unique?
If he charges me a quarter for a dump, I’ll charge him a dollar not to miss.
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If I could charge people for missing, I’d be a very wealthy woman.
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Go for it. But instead of money, make them scrub the bathroom. Then, film it and put it on YouTube. They’ll only miss once.
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He sounds delightful
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Allthoughtswork, keep reading this blog. Soon I will be posting about the crazy things that happen in our studio bathroom. You will be amazed. And probably horrified. I like your suggestion, though!
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Thank you for sharing! That was awesome!
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