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Tonight, the cats sat me down for an intervention.

Satch: We need to talk. We’re worried about you.

Dizzy: Yes, you shouldn’t let S go away for this many days in a row again. Ever. Again.

Satch: First, you repainted the bathroom that you had just painted about a month ago. Then, you wouldn’t stop playing “let’s see how many things we can stack on the cat.” We all laughed the first 8 times, but honestly, it’s getting old.

Dizzy: Then we witnessed you doing laundry…FOR FUN!

Satch: <shuddering> And tonight, we watched you discover that the bamboo flooring is both slippery and will not give you splinters, and thus the reenactments of the Risky Business dance scene commenced. Enough.

Dizzy: ENOUGH! Why don’t you just make yourself useful and cook us up a nice fish filet? Or scratch this spot right behind my ear that’s been driving me crazy?

Satch: Stop it! He didn’t say to try to stack more things on him! You’re out of control. I’m breaking out the bourbon.