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I don’t mean to brag or anything, but Fractured Memories is currently ranked 528,625th on Amazon.com. I know. I’m practically a bestseller. Beat that, book-that’s-ranked-528,636th. I’ve made about $15 on Amazon so far, so I’m considering retiring while I’m on top.

The question, though, is to what wonderful locale shall I retire? Honolulu was recently ranked “severely unaffordable,” so that sounds promising. When you factor in the 7 stickers with my art on them that I’ve sold for $0.12 a piece on RedBubble, we can add another $0.91 to the $15 I’ve made on Amazon. So I’m pretty sure Honolulu is doable. Okay, so I might not be the best at The Math, but I’m probably ranked around 528,625th among artists who are also mathematicians. I’m practically the new Federal Reserve Chair.

The moral of this post? Go into the arts, kids. You’ll be rolling in money.

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Thanks so much for reading my ridiculous thoughts! If you’d like to see my ridiculous thoughts translated into art, visit my website, or follow me on Facebook and Twitter. Know a caregiver, or someone with dementia, or someone who knows someone with dementia, or someone who knows someone who knows someone else who’s a caregiver? Or heck, do you know a person? Well, you should tell them about my book, Fractured Memories: Because Demented People Need Love, Too. Part memoir and part coffee table art book, I recount my family’s heartbreaking and hilarious journey through my father’s dementia. Available to purchase here (this is my favorite way if you live in the U.S.), here or here if you’d rather get the eBook than a print copy, and here (especially if you want a hard cover copy).

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