Tag Archives: inertia

Let the Lames Begin

29 Thursday Sep 2016

Posted by in family, kindness, Uncategorized

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It’s that time of year, people, when my depression tends to take hold and turn me into this:

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This years seems to be no different. Partly, I’m sad. I just had my first birthday without my dad. Today is my parents’ anniversary. Next month will be his birthday followed by the holidays. So some of my inertia is grief related, but I need to be honest that some of what I’m feeling is my crankypants brain being crankypants for the sake of crankypantsness. Fun fun fun for everyone!

While I do need to be careful to take steps to stop the negative cyclical thinking so that it doesn’t turn into another long term depression, I’m also going to be a little more gentle on myself this year. When the mental fog hits, the funny doesn’t come as easily. The creative goes into hiding. The social takes a vacation. This year, I accept that. I will be kinder to myself. I will not beat myself up for slacking off a little. So I’m still going to make an effort to post semi-regularly, I’m going to make myself keep painting, I’m going to try to see friends, but I’m also going to let myself take some down time. So please forgive me if the posts are a little less frequent over the next couple months until I emerge from the cycle. If you’re a blogging buddy, please forgive me for not reading as many of your posts as I usually do. I promise that I still love you and wish you were here to hang out eating junk food on the sofa with me. If you feel like stopping by with some bourbon, I won’t stop you.

Inertia

01 Wednesday Apr 2015

Posted by in art, humor, painting

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I’m currently at rest, which means I’m tending to stay at rest. You know, it’s that whole inertia thingy. I’m in an artistic downturn at the moment, and am feeling wholly unmotivated, in part because painting requires me to go to my place of work, and who wants to do that on a day off? These artistic lulls used to panic me, but now I know that that’s part of my cycle, like menstruation, only without all the tampons.

Now that my male readers have run off screaming, I’ll continue. My artistic motivation also wanes when I’m not feeling well, which has been happening a lot lately, but with the warmer weather arriving, I’m starting to feel a little better. I’m planning on doing a little more work this afternoon, and then, since my class at the studio was cancelled, take advantage of a night off to just paint something small and meaningless for trots and chortles (shits and giggles seems overused, so I’m improvising). I just have to get past the inertia long enough to haul out my supplies and get set up.

What I really need is an agent peddling my wares to galleries and buyers so that I have somewhere to put all the art I make. It’s so hard to justify making more when you know you’ll just have to store it. I’ve started painting much smaller works just so I need less space to store all that crap art. I’m horrible about submitting to galleries because it’s such an ego-bitch-slapper when they say no.  I wish we had those old-school art patrons who commissioned work all the time so you had to keep painting and knew it was going somewhere other than your own wall or storage unit. I’d happily paint whatever they wanted just for an excuse to play with paint for a living. Someone, please find me a Medici. And a pony. Oh oh, wait! I want a pony-riding Medici. Or a Medici-riding pony. Either one will work, as long as I get to play with the pony and make art for the Medici.

What the hell is wrong with my brain today?

UPDATE: Literally about 5 minutes after posting this, I overheard someone walking past the studio say, “I have terrible inertia.” Ha!