Tag Archives: The Labyrinth

Freak Show

06 Monday Mar 2017

Posted by in dance, kindness, music, Uncategorized

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Today is all about freaks. Why? Because I said so. So here are 3 freaky things for your viewing and listening pleasure. This outta help you start your day off right.

First, several years ago, I was David Bowie from The Labyrinth for Halloween. Because David Bowie:

David Bowie.jpeg

Yes, that is a rolled up sock (actually MULTIPLE rolled up socks) stuffed down the crotch of my pants.

Second, I give you the first song I started my day with: Ani Difranco’s Freakshow. This is an excellent song to screamsing to.

And third, I give you the the second song I started my day with: Timmy Trumpet and Savage’s Freaks. This is an excellent song to stompdance to.

Good morning. Now go about your freakish day.

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Thanks so much for reading my ridiculous thoughts! If you’d like to see my ridiculous thoughts translated into art, visit my website, or follow me on Facebook and Twitter. Know a caregiver, or someone with dementia, or someone who knows someone with dementia, or someone who knows someone who knows someone else who’s a caregiver? Or heck, do you know a person? Well, you should tell them about my book, Fractured Memories: Because Demented People Need Love, Too. Part memoir and part coffee table art book, I recount my family’s heartbreaking and hilarious journey through my father’s dementia. Available to purchase here (this is my favorite way if you live in the U.S.), here if you’d rather get the eBook than a print copy, and here (especially if you want a hard cover copy).

book-cover-1

It May Have Escaped Your Notice, But Life Isn’t Fair

16 Saturday Jan 2016

Posted by in culture, death, humor, Uncategorized

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Dude. 2016 is off to a rocky start. I’ve had a host of personal issues going on from multiple car break downs, the sale of our house falling through, all the crap with my dad, and now a couple celebs that I genuinely liked have passed away. But I’m determined not to get too down. In an effort to not let you get too down either, I’m going to describe for you a battle I’ve been waging for the last roughly 3 weeks. It involves a lot death. See? Isn’t that cheerful?

Apparently, I’m running both a brothel and a death camp for fruit  flies. There is blood on my hands. I’m committing mass murder by – and I wish this were hyperbole – the thousands. I’ve tried everything: vinegar, apple cider vinegar, red wine, xhgdgfbh (sorry, that was me swatting one that landed on the key board), white wine, the little traps you can buy at the store, apple cider vinegar with dish soap, windex, ammonia, and bleach. We’ve called an exterminator who said we’re doing everything there is to do and we just have to wait it out. I will do no such thing. I’ve clapped them between my hand and the wall, my hand and the sink, my hand and the toilet, my hand and a giant blob of paint (that was interesting to clean up), my hand and a painting, my hand and the keyboard, my hand and the computer screen, my hand and the bathroom mirror, and my hand and the back of my husband’s head. But still, they come. I’ve killed ones that are in the active process of bumping uglies. I’ve killed ones that were dive bombing me and my customers. I’ve killed ones loitering and begging for change near the sink drain. I’ve even killed ones quietly sipping their morning coffee. I am ruthless. I show no mercy. I will prevail. I hope you will stand with me in solidarity.

In case my plight did not sufficiently cheer you, I will share a picture with you of me as David Bowie as the Goblin King from The Labyrinth several years ago. Yes, there is a sock stuffed in my pants. ‘Cause that’s how the Goblin King rolled.

David Bowie costume 2009

Word to the wise, do not wear this costume for Halloween in FL. You will become dehydrated from all the sweating. It’s lucky I’m still alive.